Your secret touch eases
the clatter in my mind,
feeding crocuses
down to the flowering sound
of stillness—
where your hands open windows
that color the marrow of our grief
as rain swings in with its massive hips,
misting our faces
in tracks of tears
like drops down glass.
Perhaps your touch awakens angels
who swim through open windows,
riding in on the rain.
Brenda Warren 2012
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Brenda, it’s just lovely. That touch easing and awakening. And I love “the flowering sound / of stillness”. Like Mary’s poem, this one seems to go from secret to public, more encompassing.
Richard
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I love the idea of angels riding on raindrops! Wonderfully written poem, the imagery is so vivid.
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Beautiful piece – the final stanza is a ‘sock-knocker’. Brava!
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Brenda, first, thank you for an intriguing set of words this week. I went gardening and… oy.
That last stanza is the icing on a perfect poem – the angels complete the scene. Thanks, and peace, Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/05/21/always-and-forever-ironweed-dammit/
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Wow, I love every line of uniquely creative imagery. Poignant poem of grief and perhaps rescue.
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‘as rain swings in with its massive hips’
just love that image
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I was pleased when it came through.
Thanks Mark.
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What can I say that hasn’t already been said? I too liked the image of Rain-Angels and the last stanza. I wasn’t too happy with mine either until I thought of ‘shaping’ it. – And that is why we are gifted with friends to set us straight!
Thanks to you and others visits I am happier with what I wrote now.
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Brenda, I thought your use of the words were fresh & original. The poem opens and closes so beautifully
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Thank you, Irene. This one didn’t come easy. It’s nice to have it well received. 🙂
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“as rain swings in with its massive hips” !!! Hot damn, girl! I need to come to your side of town!
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LOL, Thanks Cheryl….You are welcome any time. 😉
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You have found my heart with this piece. Stunning from beginning to end.
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Thank you Teri, what a great comment!
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❤
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“The flowering sound of stillness” and “rain swings in with its massive hips” are brilliant lines, Brenda! I adore that last stanza: “Perhaps your touch awakens angels who swim through open windows, riding in on the rain.” What a gorgeous image!
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Thank you, Marianne. I appreciate your thoughts.
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Yes, Brenda, the last stanza sets up a beautiful conclusion to the lovely piece of writing.
Pamela
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Thanks Pamela. 🙂
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stunningly gorgeous — you had me with those 2 opening lines! I’ve read through it several times — and it just gets better and better with each read!
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Thank you Paula. Your comment makes me feel good. I appreciate your visit.
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This is lovely and powerful brenda and I’m with Walt – it’s the angels who swim through open windows, riding in on the rain” that caught my fancy as well – but all of the imagery is good
Thanks also for stopping by the Poet Treehouse … I appreciate it.
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Thanks Sharon. Visits are good things. It’s nice to see you here, too. I like how you’ve muted your eye.
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“Perhaps your touch awakens angels
who swim through open windows,
riding in on the rain.”
Wow, Brenda. That is an image that astounds and evokes awe. Thanks for this.
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Thank you for your enthusiastic comment, Walt. I’m so glad you enjoyed your read.
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Okay…I was about to state the same lines/thoughts! Great writing, Brenda! 🙂
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Thanks Hannah. 🙂
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:)!
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Lovely! And another good group of wordle words.
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Thanks Peggy!
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This one sings Brenda. Especially love “down to the flowering sound of stillness.” I stopped there and went back several times, just to listen and feel it tickle its way through my inner ear. Fine write,
Elizabeth
http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2012/05/20/starting-over/
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Thank you, Elizabeth.
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Ah, that last part is lovely. knock-out fresh.
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Thank you, and the scooter you rode in on. 🙂
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“like drops down glass!” its so thoughtful and creative 🙂 loved to be here.. such brilliance and thoughtfulness.. good luck!
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Thank you mahrukh, for your encouragement.
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So much movement through the poem. I felt as if I were moving with it. Love the rain swinging its hips.
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Thanks, Margo. It was fun to reread it after reading your comments. I can feel it, too.
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If there is indeed a touch that awakens angels, I crave it…now…
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A friend told me that when lightbulbs burn out, there is an angel nearby….
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This is lovely. Bren quoted the words that I liked best as well! So I will say: ditto!
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Thank you Mary, I’m glad you liked it.
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Love the imagery, Angels swimming in, riding in on the rain.
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Thanks, I like that part, too.
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Truly love that last stanza. And have I mentioned that I LOVE the image of the Swainson’s hawk in your banner?
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Thank you for stopping to read. I think the bird is a Northern Harrier, but I may be wrong. I just got a new lens for my camera last week, and took that picture with it. I’ll be looking up Swainson’s hawk later to see if I misidentified it. I have several other pictures of it from different angles, and I enhanced this one a bit to play with the lighting.
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Ah! Ok, actually male northern harrier makes sense.There are some similarities in the markings. I am out of practice and don’t see a lot of either of them around here, though I know harriers are around PA. Looking at it again, I see my mistake. Long plank-like wings. I did have the impression initially it was taking up more air space than a Swainson’s. From other angles, I am going to guess it had a shallow v shape to those wings.
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