four seeming sentences

Sometimes it seems
these trees court the sky;
their threading evergreen plumes
woo the driest blue.

Sometimes it seems,
the hills glow coral
as if some alien incident
bathed them in chemical luminescence,
sprayed from bottle-shaped ships.

Sometimes it seems.
creatures dream
in smoke that billows and balls
out the chimney across the street.

Sometimes it seems,
birdsong still screams through
silence, once scarce,
as our heartbeats echo the girls.

Brenda Warren 2013

Process Notes:

After the first stanza came, I decided to use the same process for the remaining stanzas until all the words were in place. I started with “sometimes it seems,” then looked out my window for inspiration. This writing activity might show up in my classroom if I need a “filler” activity. Teachers use fillers when a lesson runs short and we need to “fill” time with a quick activity. This one provides practice in figurative language and sentence structure. Each stanza is a complete sentence, beginning with an adverbial clause. It will deepen my students’ understanding of adverbs. Teacher me diagrammed two of the stanzas already. My students can diagram their sentences for an extra point or a trip to the classroom treasure chest.

We placed our macaws with the Montana Parrot and Exotic Bird Sanctuary this past week. My students know that it was a rough decision for me. The last stanza is dedicated to Sadie and Sophia. Len and Thyra drove the girls to the sanctuary, and were delighted with the girls’ responses to their new home. They took to the people running it immediately, and seemed intrigued by their new flock. They will stay there for a while, and eventually will go to new homes. This final stanza will give my students a concrete example of what I mean when I say, “Write what you know.”

I did not use the word “rare” as scarce provides consonance. I also reworked the final stanza without the word “term.”

Visit The Sunday Whirl.

17 thoughts on “four seeming sentences

  1. Brenda, I came here looking for a wordle poem and I see you didn’t write one. I want to thank you for commenting on mine. I hope you are enjoying your day off. I am having visions of Easter vacation myself, lol 🙂

    Pamela

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  2. Loved your notes, Brenda. Thanks for sharing them with us. I just might try this technique myself, someday! 🙂
    I finally got around to posting to prompt #95. *sigh* Better late than never…wouldn’t want to break my streak! 😉 Now…on to #96…hopefully before a whole week passes!!

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  3. Brenda, your poem and the process notes are fabulous. Each stanza could stand independently, very cool. Your students are so lucky to have you as their teacher. On the other hand, I am so sorry to hear you had to give up Sadie and Sophia, it must of been a difficult decision for you all.

    Pamela

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  4. What a great exercise/wordle and back-story of your process for these words Brenda – not to mention the explanation for what is happening with your girls (such a touching tale) – a beautiful poem to boot – really fine. Thanks for stopping by my blog also – I don’t know how you manage it but you sure get a lot done – I appreciate it!

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  5. I can very much identify with the first stanza – As I’ve planted all the pines in my yard. All were maybe two or three feet over twenty years ago. And now they too, “woo the driest blue”.

    Thank you for your visit to ‘Current.’ I only briefly thought of ‘valentines’ because it is February. But after I used all the ‘Wordles’ in the first stanza I felt the ‘story’ unfinished…So I prodded the muse. 🙂

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  6. I’m fascinated by your process notes—they are so detailed! I, on the other hand, have little idea how my work comes into being. It just happens, and I am grateful that I have something to show for my (usually) sustained effort. I like the idea (why didn’t I think of it?) of using poetry as a filler activity in the classroom, and I shall herewith and forthwith steal it! 🙂

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    • Steal away! I love my first stanza, but nothing more would come afterward. When nothing comes, I use a form, or do some type of repetition. Your students’ poetry will surprise you.

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