Post-argument pain beats through hollow hearts
like birds behind bars fluttering nowhere.
Leaping words cascade into rocky landscapes
and dry woods rise between eyes.
Although in the distance
a brook’s current glistens deliverance,
phantom pain persists, pulling its chest up,
righting its wronged regality,
denying deliverance into love’s sweet flow.
Eventually, the current rubs smooth words
hanging out there, all craggy and sharp
wishing they’d never been said.
New moments peer up through earth in the wood,
shining there, lighting the dark.
Brenda Warren 2012
Visit The Sunday Whirl.
Process Notes: The first line originally read “phantom pain;” I changed it to “post-argument pain” to provide a richer context.
I’ve finally written my piece for #82 and haven’t made the rounds yet (and not sure if I’m going to be able to — the joys of PAD and the Holidays coming)…I wonder how many wrote of phantom pain (that’s where I took the word, as well).
Loved the 3rd stanza…nicely done!
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i cannot pick a favorite part from your piece.. and it rings so true.. love it..
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Beautifully put, Brenda.
Love the caged bird visual.
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Wonderful piece. I particularly like “craggy and sharp wishing they’d never been said”. So true.
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My favorite as well.
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I believe I was in that exact place with some people I know this past week. Poignant piece, nicely penned, Brenda.
Pamela
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The nature imagery is interesting, Brenda.
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Ahh… I love this, Brenda… especially the first stanza. Phantom pain, too.
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Oh how often have I regretted sharp words. Your poem puts that into perspective with beautiful phrases.
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Thanks again for a fun wordle Brenda. I like what you created with the words. it is so much fun to see where we each go with these! Write on!
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All those pained memories that everyone tells you to let go of…and yet they rear up now and again. Sometimes all we need is a good walk alone in the woods to see things in a new light.
Thanks for visiting:
http://julesgemsandstuff.blogspot.com/2012/11/sunday-whirl-82-across-pond-not-story.html
If the internet has brought anything to me it is how others see …and what wonderful places they are. I hope you are keeping warm. 🙂
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Excellently done. I hate phantom pain and the pain left by words can be devastating.
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Love it Brenda. Had taken a break and come back to read. My last thoughts before doing so were about writing up a “code of silence”. Then I read your words. Wow! The phantom pain our tongues cost us is oh so real. But I love your choice to see the quickening in new thoughts sprouting up from that darkness. Wonderful writing,
Elizabeth
http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2012/11/11/staring-into-the-future/
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Muy existential! Dark – with a glimmer of light in the distance. Nicely done!
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Good description. I recognise this place.
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I’m letting my tongue savor “righting its wronged regality.” I love the alliteration!
Seven Haiku with Simon
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Phantom pain must be awful. When you read about an amputee still feeling the limb and they pain they experience. The birds fluttering behind bars is a sad image. This is pretty dark and yet, you leave us the beauty in the flowing brook and the hope which comes in new moments peeping through the wood to light the dark.
Brilliant.
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