His whispers first caress
her body’s field
like apple blossoms
covered in bees.
And then,
she sees flames come,
come licking scarlet vines
across his back,
commemorating sleep’s inevitability,
vicious and unforgiving.
A severed pair expects
no spare moments,
no moments to share
behind a smoke
-strewn
sky.
Until . . .
Save me in bits, she prays.
His screams strike might
like irons against time’s silent crescendo,
while her heated flesh whispers
and wakes her
to the dizzying scent
of apple blossoms buzzing.
Brenda Warren 2014
This one came rather quickly. It is not autobiographical, but grief imagined. There is a lot left unsaid. My imagination fills it with story, and I hope yours hooks into the piece, too.
I used “strike” instead of “struck.”
Hi nice reading yoour post
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Great header and powerful poetry on grief imagined ~ carol, xxx (A Creative Harbor)
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“Undercaws” has been included in the Sites To See for this week. Be assured that I hope this helps to point many new visitors in your direction.
http://asthecrackerheadcrumbles.blogspot.com/2014/01/sites-to-see_17.html
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visually stunning words that captured me by surprise…… blossoms’ bees with love sprinkled in flames…. “…save me in bits…” thinking thoughts with wings… lovely…
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Oh, my word. This line:
“Save me in bits, she prays.”
Heavens.
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This struck a deep feeling in me, Brenda. Thank you for your kind words on my blog. You are such a kind person, and I am glad we have crossed paths.
Pamela ox
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Sometimes when they come quickly, it just means they’ve been waiting for that perfect moment. What a delight that is. Like everyone else, I love the apple blossoms covered with bees and the reflexive at the end is a spectacular closing. Really, really like this Brenda,
Elizabeth
http://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/2014/01/05/point-of-view-2/
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her body’s field
like apple blossoms
covered in bees.
So beautifully tied to the close. Fave this one, Brenda.
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this poem is explosive, passionate grief. That second stanza is strong!
licking scarlet vines across his back….woah! Thank goodness for sweet apple blossoms and being saved in bits…Powerful write, Brenda. Very powerful.
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very nicely done. I liked it a lot
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I’ve read this poem several time…not because I have to but because I want to. There are so many delights here from whispers to blossoms.
Like Marianne, I’m willing to help out, too. If you’d like a list of words, just let me know!
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Gorgeous writing, Brenda! I love this:
“Until . . .
Save me in bits, she prays.”
The Whirl is a testament to you, a strong, kind, caring woman. Thank you for keeping it going. Is there a way we can assist you, to somehow lighten your load?
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Beautifully penned, Brenda.
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the scent of apples will never be the same again!
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Beautifully rendered….image of a dream….with apple blossoms and buzzes!
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Yes…the apple blossoms seem like a life raft in the night..hope..a lightness that can slowly strike down grief..
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Dreams with all the twists and turns are always there. It would be fun if balanced with all the goodness of apple blossoms and all.Well crafted Brenda!
Hank
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What a relief to wake up from that dream! You managed to rack up the stress to a high degree, then cure it with appleblossom. Lovely.
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Really like apple blossoms buzzing. I can see and hear them.
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I never really had such dreams but my wife did so all was not bad as my comforting her back to sleep was very pleasant for both of us!
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A dream and a bit. A very creative use of the words.
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Your words just brought a smile. thank you.
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I think the scent of apple blossoms saves her.
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